Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts | 
 enlarge | Authors: Carol Tavris, Elliot Aronson
Publisher: Harvest Books
Category: Book
List Price: $15.00
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Avg. Customer Rating:  61 reviews
Sales Rank: 3295
Media: Paperback
Edition: 1
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 304
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.7
Dimensions (in): 7.9 x 5.3 x 0.9
ISBN: 0156033909
Dewey Decimal Number: 302
EAN: 9780156033909
ASIN: 0156033909
Publication Date: March 2008
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Product Description
Why do people dodge responsibility when things fall apart? Why the parade of public figures unable to own up when they screw up? Why the endless marital quarrels over who is right? Why can we see hypocrisy in others but not in ourselves? Are we all liars? Or do we really believe the stories we tell? Backed by years of research and delivered in lively, energetic prose, Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me) offers a fascinating explanation of self-deception—how it works, the harm it can cause, and how we can overcome it.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 56 more reviews...
 ** September 9, 2008
1 out of 4 found this review helpful
A note to the authors: PHYSICIAN HEAL THYSELF! I gave up on this book after all the Republican-bashing. And I'm not a Republican. But the bashing made it clear that the authors' take on the subject matter was hardly going to include any meaningful scientific objectivity. I mean, why include for their examples politics at all? Why not stick to areas (like athletics, say) where the data is much more cut-and-dry? I guess mistakes were made. Glad I checked it out of the library and didn't pay for it.
 what a terrific book! September 1, 2008
3 out of 3 found this review helpful
I'm not usually a big fan of 'self-help' books, but I was caught by the title and couldn't resist. What a terrific book! Well written and accessible, the authors do a very good job of making their many points about the mechanisms of self-justification (and why we should all care) without sounding accusatory or offending the reader. I highly recommend this book to pretty much anyone and everyone.
 Beware of the Kindle edition August 31, 2008
0 out of 1 found this review helpful
This fine book has extensive and substantive footnotes, but the lousy Kindle software doesn't have live links to the footnotes, which makes it MUCH more difficult to move back and forth between the text and the footnotes. The only hope is to add a bookmark to the page you are on, and then move to the footnote section, which starts at location 3638 -- leave a bookmark at the last footnote you looked at, and then when you want to look at the next footnote, you can go back to that bookmark. Then, every now and then, delete the previous bookmarks for the earlier pages/footnotes.
 dissonance August 29, 2008
0 out of 4 found this review helpful
This is a book about dissonance and the attempts the mind makes to resolve it. The basic mechanism is: I'm a good person, I did something that a good person wouldn't do, therefore, my perspective on my action changes to something a good person would do.
I think there's a good, lengthy magazine article wanting to come out of this book. There are examples but they feel cut short, and there are interesting asides that aren't explored (example: they say we're more influenced by small gifts than large ones and has a footnote with a reference to a note in a study). It's hard to use as a reference too. For example, the pages do not show the chapter, which makes it quite difficult to look up footnotes...or find my place.
how ego maintenance exacts a huge price July 11, 2008
3 out of 3 found this review helpful
Who wants to admit he was wrong, made a mistake, exercised poor judgment, was misled or conned? None of us do, but most of us are skillful at excusing or justifying those acts. This absorbing book explains why and how we reduce "cognitive dissonance" to maintain a favorable self image in spite of overt misbehavior or failure. Beyond that, the authors show how destructive this tendency can be, not just in terms of social fairness or justice but also in the insidious corrosion of our own beings. There are fascinating examples of the most mind-boggling efforts to justify inexcusable, criminal, inhuman, and hateful behavior. And there are inspiring stories of people, good people who nevertheless state clearly that they blew it, that they were responsible for another person's destruction, loss, freedom, reputation, or life itself. Finally, this book offers real hope in showing an alternative to our culture's perverse fear of making a mistake and even worse, admitting to one. They provide true stories of how such admissions can actually deter litigation instead of inviting it. In an engaging yet logical argument they make a most convincing case for the power and healing potential of personal humility, honesty, and continual self-examination. If this book was widely read and its principles applied I think there would be a lot of unemployed attorneys. And a far better world to live in. I will be re-reading this book soon.
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